As a woman navigating college life, I often hear the phrase “just a girl” in pop culture, social media and even among friends. At first glance, it seems harmless enough, a catchy way to acknowledge the unique experiences of being a woman.
Still, these phrases also have the consequence of reducing women to nothing more than their gender, promoting sexist ideals and undermining women in subtle yet powerful ways.
One of the most damaging aspects of the “just a girl” mentality is the way it simplifies the complexity of women’s identities by reducing them solely to their gender.
By saying “I’m just a girl,” women are implicitly positioning themselves as inherently less capable, less ambitious or less complex than they are, as the decisions we’re making are portrayed as unrooted in us as individuals but as “girls”.
This phrase, when used in certain contexts, serves as a self-imposed limit: it suggests that being a girl is somehow an excuse for underachievement or irresponsibility. Instead of celebrating the full scope of what a woman can achieve, the phrase can subtly promote the idea that women are entitled to less than men or make decisions just because of their gender.
In addition to limiting women’s potential, the “just a girl” mentality perpetuates harmful gender stereotypes ingrained in society for generations.
For example, the terms “girl math” and “girl therapy” – I have seen both used in economic contexts, used to justify the use of cash as it isn’t “real money” or the overconsumption of products as a means of resolving emotional distress. Both serve to depict women as being financially irresponsible, consequently drawing an unconscious comparison between “girl” and “boy” math.
The phrase also implicitly ties women to traditional notions of femininity. While these traits are not inherently bad, they become problematic when women are expected to embody them exclusively, or when they’re seen as traits we have as girls rather than people.
Consider the countless memes, quotes and social media posts that play on the “just a girl” trope, often portraying women as overly dramatic, ditzy or incapable of handling complexity. For example, the “just a girl” phrase is used in food videos where the woman is seen preparing a “girl dinner”, usually consisting of “a meal typically consisting of snacks, side dishes, and small portions of (often randomly assembled) foods.”
While the decision to eat snacks isn’t inherently problematic, it has the side effect of portraying something women do as, again, limited – “girl dinner” isn’t a full dinner and has even been condemned by some as a depiction of disordered eating.
These portrayals have a subtle but lasting effect on how women see themselves and society perceives them.
When we buy into this mentality, we reinforce the idea that women must fit into these narrow boxes, sidelining the diversity women possess – stunting the development of individual women and contributing to the societal devaluation of women as a whole.
Some people indeed use the “just a girl” mentality as a way of celebrating the unique struggles that women face, empowering women to communicate experiences that are entirely their own. From navigating a world that often underestimates or undermines us, to facing gender-based expectations, the phrase can seem like a reclamation of identity.
Women have long been told that we are “too much” or “not enough,” and so expressing “I’m just a girl” can be an act of self-affirmation in a world that often dismisses our voices.
However, this celebration is often misplaced, as the “just a girl” mentality can quickly become a form of self-limitation.
Rather than empowering women to defy those challenges and aim for greatness, it can instead create a false narrative of inevitability—suggesting that being a girl means that obstacles are insurmountable and gender is an unshakable barrier to true equality.
In a sense, the mentality is a passive acceptance of the limitations that feminism has worked so hard to dismantle.
Instead of embracing the “just a girl” mentality, we should focus on recognizing and celebrating women for who they are as individuals, not for their gender. The future of feminism lies in a world where women are seen as complex human beings —not as people whose primary identity is their gender.
It’s time to stop using gender as a limit and start emphasizing the limitless possibilities women have. Let’s celebrate women by recognizing the vast spectrum of possibilities we embody, not by limiting ourselves to a phrase far too small for the greatness we achieve.
